Posts Tagged ‘garrison keillor’

A shameful confession and a new hope.

I really hate to admit this, but there’s something about getting it all out there in public that makes things better so here goes; my baby likes Garrison Keillor.

I don’t know how it happened. I mean, her taste in music is fabulous. When it comes to dance party (#danceparty) she loves to rock out to to the likes of Franti and Heiruspecs and enjoys genres from rock to raggae.

Yet, time and time again when she’s heard Mr.Keillor (through no fault of my own) she settles down and seems pleased as punch. Heck, half the time she’s found him so relaxing she’s fallen asleep.

Yes, Dear Internets, my baby seems to like Mr.Wobegon and I can’t deny it.

Yet, if only she could read she may change her mind. In his latest diatribe, Garrison Keillor: Don’t yearn for the bright lights, Garrison has the guts and fortitude to take on television. What a bold strike at the heart of criminals and slack jaws!

My favorite sentence comes soon,fast, and hard as the kettle meets the pot in what I can only call dramatic irony.

When you look at the audience numbers for TV and then add up the incarcerated felons, Alzheimer’s patients and confirmed barflies in America, it dawns on you who is watching TV these days — people unable to lead normal productive lives — and yet they give out awards for this stuff and the hosts of shows are driven to and fro in Lincoln Town Cars and they suffer from toxic self-esteem.

Wow.   A 70 word sentence? Toxic self-esteem indeed.

Sadly, comments have been turned off. *edit comments are again working

I guess,according to Garrison, there is still hope if your into “tango, or playing drop-thumb banjo, or digging up ancient cities, or writing sonnets, you are beautiful”. You can bet he goes on to quote some of his sonnets.  

Well you, Mr. Garrison Keillor, are a beautiful man. Or at the very least, you seem to think so and you do have a knack for putting my baby to sleep.

Thanks for the heads up on that t.v. stuff. Now I can be proactive and prevent the likes of Fred Rogers, Sesame Street, and Builder Bob from turning her into the “bedridden, the delusional and the criminal”.

She already seems to like you I find that troubling enough.



Three New-to-Me Local Sites: Biking, Boogie, and the Mississippi River

I stumbled across all of these in the last couple days and thought I’d share.

Ride Boldly! is a blog focusing on “bikes, bicycling, and road safety.” It’s good info in general but I what I really like about it is it specifically addresses MN bike statutes, general biking issues with a local spin (e.g., Bicycle Facilities Issues, Plan Now for Winter Cycling), and infrastructure issues as they apply to biking.

West Bank Boogie is a book by Cyn Collins that “celebrates 40 years of Minneapolis Minnesota’s West Bank music scene with profiles of more than 20 legendary musicians who influenced the soul of American music.” It’s a really cool website for a book (“for a book” is meant to be descriptive, not a qualifier). Great info about the book (it started as a series of articles in the Seward Profile), where to get it, and the profiled artists. Don’t let the fact that the foreword and also the first listed endorsement come from Garrison Keillor put you off.

Friends of the Riverfront is “a group of concerned citizens and park users… working to conserve, protect, and enhance the resources of the Central Mississippi Riverfront Regional Park.” It sounds like a noble and worthy mission, though they currently appear to be entirely focused on fighting against the proposed De La Salle football stadium on Nicollet Island and I kind of wonder if that’s why they came into being in the first place. So if you want to know more about that hot topic (without the crazy Phyllis Kahn stories), check it out.


twin_cities – LiveJournal is a wealth of information. Where to find a divorce support group. Where to get a whole hog. Where to unload your chinchillas. Where the cheap monthly parking is in downtown St. Paul. And that’s just today!

Minnesota MonitorPodcast from the Neighborhood Sustainability Conference held at Augsburg College. MnMon’s all multimedia and shit. Follow them on Twitter, too.

MN DailyU receives $1.7 million in grants to tackle obesity. I’m sure all the giant food companies based in town will be watching closely.

vita.mnPubes! Man, people get riled up over maintenance of The Hair Down There. See also, mnspeak and Sornie. Watch the euphemisms and metaphors come out of the woodwork.

NewsCut – Bob Collins reaction to the Keillor mansion non-story is the same as mine, and better expressed.

MinnPost – David Brauer on the cesspool that is’s comments in light of a recent public defender’s argument that “her client’s trial — for making terroristic threats against 10-year-old boy — should be moved from Ramsey County because of public comments on, the Pioneer Press website.” Pretty good analysis of the comment mechanism at the PiPress’s site. (As of right now, zero comments on this MinnPost story.)

Minneapolis Issues Forum – On the problem of architectural theft. Happens all the time with shady contractors and is really hard to document for insurance purposes.

What if I buy a mansion on Summit Ave?

Can someone explain to me why Garrison Keillor buying a Summit Ave mansion makes the TC Biz Journal? Their source is the Star Tribune, but… again, in the Biz Journal?

I guess they couldn’t resolve the issue with their neighbor over the garage and so they decided to just move instead.

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