A shameful confession and a new hope.

I really hate to admit this, but there’s something about getting it all out there in public that makes things better so here goes; my baby likes Garrison Keillor.

I don’t know how it happened. I mean, her taste in music is fabulous. When it comes to dance party (#danceparty) she loves to rock out to to the likes of Franti and Heiruspecs and enjoys genres from rock to raggae.

Yet, time and time again when she’s heard Mr.Keillor (through no fault of my own) she settles down and seems pleased as punch. Heck, half the time she’s found him so relaxing she’s fallen asleep.

Yes, Dear Internets, my baby seems to like Mr.Wobegon and I can’t deny it.

Yet, if only she could read she may change her mind. In his latest diatribe, Garrison Keillor: Don’t yearn for the bright lights, Garrison has the guts and fortitude to take on television. What a bold strike at the heart of criminals and slack jaws!

My favorite sentence comes soon,fast, and hard as the kettle meets the pot in what I can only call dramatic irony.

When you look at the audience numbers for TV and then add up the incarcerated felons, Alzheimer’s patients and confirmed barflies in America, it dawns on you who is watching TV these days — people unable to lead normal productive lives — and yet they give out awards for this stuff and the hosts of shows are driven to and fro in Lincoln Town Cars and they suffer from toxic self-esteem.

Wow.   A 70 word sentence? Toxic self-esteem indeed.

Sadly, comments have been turned off. *edit comments are again working

I guess,according to Garrison, there is still hope if your into “tango, or playing drop-thumb banjo, or digging up ancient cities, or writing sonnets, you are beautiful”. You can bet he goes on to quote some of his sonnets.  

Well you, Mr. Garrison Keillor, are a beautiful man. Or at the very least, you seem to think so and you do have a knack for putting my baby to sleep.

Thanks for the heads up on that t.v. stuff. Now I can be proactive and prevent the likes of Fred Rogers, Sesame Street, and Builder Bob from turning her into the “bedridden, the delusional and the criminal”.

She already seems to like you I find that troubling enough.



2 Comments so far

  1. Art (artallen) on January 7th, 2009 @ 2:30 pm

    Garrison Keillor sure has convinced me! Isn’t it nice to know he’s so much better than us? And isn’t it kind and benevolent of him to remind us as often as he does?

  2. David (jacc) on January 8th, 2009 @ 1:14 pm

    I honor and thank him!

    I wonder what he has to say about the people in Minnetonka with flat screen tv’s in their ice houses?

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