Tonight is the Grand Opening Celebration ^[1] of Slumberland Furniture in Shakopee ^[2].

But there’s something you need to know before you consider buying anything from the giant chain’s latest local franchise. They are idiots who can’t tell LEFT from RIGHT.

The following is a rant: Last weekend we purchased a new couch sectional at the new Shakopee Slumberland location. Yesterday they delivered two left sides and a center instead of a right, left and center piece. The delivery guys were clueless and told us to call the warehouse ourselves to schedule a new delivery for that right side. We did.

Then later that same evening, Slumberland Customer Service called to ask if we were satisfied with our purchase. I indicated we were not and asked when our correct piece would be delivered. With attitude, the lady on the phone said it was beyond her control, and she didn’t know anything about it. “What do you expect me to do?” she asked arrogantly. “Well, apparently nothing. You called to ask if I’m satisfied, I’ve said ‘no’ and you’re saying, ‘oh well.’” We let it go.

Today they delivered the new piece. It was the wrong side again. The delivery guys said the left side was labeled “right,” so it really wasn’t their fault.

We called Slumberland again, and the customer service agent argued that they had indeed sent us the correct side! She asked me to double-check, and we discussed the merits of left versus right (seriously).

Over the course of today, I’ve called to request to speak with the manager three times and even had my wife take of picture of the mismatched couch to show them proof. The warehouse called me twice, customer service in North Dakota called me twice, eventually the manager called.

They all have different stories about how nobody can tell the difference between their left and right hands. We’ll see what they deliver tomorrow.

We live on the left side of the street, so maybe they’re delivering our left side of the couch to the wrong house on the right side of the street.